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Home Relationships

How to get over someone? Practical Steps

How to get over someone you loved? Steps towards Healing and Moving on

Ryleigh Graham by Ryleigh Graham
October 5, 2022
in Relationships
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How to get over someone
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Humans tend to get attached to people, places, and even things. Our attachments can be a good source of motivation for us. It can push us to do better in life. On the other hand, it can also be toxic to get attached to someone in a way that becomes a hurdle in our life. Such situations can make us wonder how to get over someone.

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Movies, songs, and poetry has filled our heads with the idea of forever. But the reality isn’t easy, and we don’t always get what we ask for. We often find ourselves stuck in our life and incapable of getting over someone. How can we get rid of our attachment? How to move ahead in life?

If you are also in that zone in your life and finding it hard to get over someone. This article will help you out, and here we will explore all the ways how to get over someone.

Why do we find it hard to get over someone?

First and foremost, we must understand why we find it hard to get over someone. We all have struggled with this at least once in our life. Why do we keep giving chances to people or think about texting people who don’t deserve it?

The attachment theory makes it easier to understand why you behave the way you do and what is your attachment style. Thus, can answer how to get over someone? If you are emotionally anxious and get attached to someone really easily.

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How to get over someone
source: Unsplash

This type of attachment can be really exhausting as these people are easily taken for granted by their partners. As they find it really hard to let others go. This is a common trait, and over time, it can be really suffocating and can be a hurdle in your growth.

If your attachment has become toxic and unhealthy for you and has started impacting your life negatively. Here are a few steps you can do to move ahead in your life and get over someone.

Accept the Reality

To begin with, you need to accept reality before you move ahead in your life. For instance, if you were dating someone who doesn’t treat you well or who doesn’t deserve you. You need to accept the fact that not everyone will treat you the same or have the same feeling for you as you do.

acceptance
source: Unsplash

Stop hoping that the situation will change or you can fix the other person. People or the situation cant change miraculously. Once you accept reality, only then can you start the healing process and eventually move ahead in your life.

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We understand that accepting reality isn’t the easiest thing to do, but eventually, it will bring out the best in you and take you to a better place in the future.

Form a Routine for Yourself

Having a routine will help you to keep a check on your mental and physical health on a daily basis. You need to understand not every day will be the same. But having a routine will help you to reduce anxiety as you can also track your growth. 

Routine checklist
source: Unsplash

A big list of things might seem intimidating, and there are many ways to develop a routine. By the end of the month, your schedule might match what you had in mind if you concentrated on one tiny thing each day.

You can incorporate habits like eating healthy, exercising, and getting an adequate amount of sleep. All these habits will help you make a better version of yourself.

 Most importantly, it will keep you occupied, and you will always have something to focus on. Rather than overthinking about someone you are trying to get over.

Focus on Self-care

Firstly, let’s clear the myth that self-care is being selfish or self-centered; instead, it means taking care of your well-being. It has been clinically proven that practicing self-care can reduce or completely remove anxiety, despair, and stress, as well as boost happiness, energy, and attention. 

Self-care can be the answer to how you can get over someone. Focus on yourself and make your well-being a priority. Stop being so hard on yourself and indulge in the things that make you happy. Keep track of your growth and take out time for yourself.

selfcare
source: Unsplash

In this age of hustle culture, we have put so much pressure on ourselves. We need to take out time for ourselves and keep a check on our mental, emotional and physical health. Find a method to prioritize yourself each day, regardless of your circumstances, so that you may recharge and be your best self.

Take some time to reevaluate your life now that you are free from the relationship and the other person. You can indulge in whatever activity that makes you happy or something that you enjoy. You can go out with your friends, go shopping, movies, or you can go for dinners.

Even the small things like taking care of your skin or wearing your favorite outfit can make you feel good about yourself and enhance your mood. This will also help you in the healing process and to grow ahead in your life.

Don’t Suppress Your Feelings

Allow yourself to feel like we have mentioned earlier; don’t be so hard on yourself. Allow yourself to feel the emotion even if you are feeling angry, sad, or shattered. Give yourself some time to process the pain of separation.

Don’t suppress your feelings because the more you try to control or avoid your feelings. It will come out in an unexpected way. Bring out your emotion. This will give you closure. Only then will you stop seeking closure from someone else.

How to get over someone
source: Unsplash

Process your feelings, and take your time. You don’t have to pretend to be strong and bold when you are not. Allow yourself to grieve. There should be no rules about how you should feel. Do not expect yourself to “feel better” right after something. Only then can you move to the other phase of your life.

Cut off the Communication

In the long term, it will be far more difficult to get over someone if you keep talking to them or trying to meet them, especially if you’re secretly hoping for a change of heart. Accept the reality that it’s not going to happen and you need to stop living in this dilemma.

Talking to someone whom you are trying to get over can be really toxic. It will constantly remind you of your struggle and will not let you accept your current situation. You will keep dragging your past like this.

We understand that this can be difficult as you are so used to their presence. But yes, you need to block them or cut them off, as you need to isolate yourself from all the memories and their reminders.

Moreover, it’s best to cut off communication with that one person if it disturbs you. Instead, Try connecting with your friends and family. Make new social connections, get to know your colleagues, and get in touch with your old buddies. This will help you socialize and will open the door for more connections in the future.

Rely on your Support System

We all require support in times of stress. Don’t be afraid to reach out to your family and friends to help you out. You don’t essentially need to face everything alone yourself. In such situations having people in your life who you can rely upon can be a real help.

Support system
source: Unsplash

You can rise from that blues and actually realize that you have a lot to be grateful for when you surround yourself with people who have your back and only have your best interests in mind. You will also feel better after talking your heart out to these people.

Step out of your Comfort Zone

Pushing yourself and attempting new things is one of the finest things you can do while you’re trying to get over someone you love. Use this chance to engage in the new hobbies that you’ve always wanted to try. It can be anything, for example, dancing, taking up a cooking class, or playing any outdoor game. Moreover, you can even meet some new people.

By doing this, you’re not only giving yourself the opportunity to have fun and meet new people, but you’re also proving to yourself that life carries on even after this person is gone.

 So, accept the growing pains and push through those self-imposed restrictions.

Plan your Future

Losing the dream of what you believe could happen in a relationship is sometimes more difficult than losing the actual person. You should look ahead rather than look back at your past. However, It will eventually take a toll on your mental, emotional and physical health.

There is no point in constantly reminding yourself of your past that deserves no place in your future. So stop living in the past and look at a brighter future ahead.

planning
source: Unsplash

Think and plan out your future, and stay focused on your growth. Channel your emotions positively and plant a better future for yourself. You no longer need to think about anybody else; your future is fully up to you. Concentrate on transforming yourself into the person you wanted to be.

You can practice manifestation and outline your objectives for the upcoming months may be inspiring since it encourages you to keep your eyes on the prize. You can do this to start looking forward to the future rather than dwelling on the past.

Take a break from Social Media

We all have a habit of looking at the profile of someone we can’t stop thinking about. This is one toxic trait that keeps dragging our past in front of us. The first step of keeping someone out of your mind is to keep them away from your eyes.

Stop checking their tweets, posts, statuses, and stories. It can make you feel stuck in an obsessive loop. We know it can be hard as there is a curiosity to know how they are doing now. But that’s the challenge, and you need to prioritize your mental and emotional health.

social media
source: Unsplash

Going on a social detox can be hard as we are so used to being active and posting everything on social media. Social media is the first thing that we check in the morning. But the ongoing trends, posts, and videos can annoy you.

So you need to take a break for yourself, and you can temporarily disable your social media. I know this can be a debate that it can trigger FOMO ( Fear Of Missing Out), and you should not be lonely at this time.

But in my opinion, if social media is bothering you, you should definitely take a temporary break and then connect with people again. Once you are ready and open to making new connections, you can always go back to social media.

Trust the power of letting go.

You live freely when you let go. Because you are no longer bound to things being a certain way or to being a certain person, everything flows. It sounds so easy to let go. It’s anything but that, though. 

These issues and attachments can be embedded in you deeply. Over time you start to believe that by sticking to a particular person or thing, you are defending yourself. We all have a tendency to guard them and constantly go back to them.

Letting go
source: Unsplash

Once you learn to let go of what is holding you back. You will feel a sense of freedom, and that void within you will be filled. So learn the power of letting go, and you will learn to overcome every fear, every grudge; nothing will hold you back.

How to get over someone: Conclusion

After all the above suggestions, now do we have the answer to how to get over someone? All the ways that we have mentioned earlier tell us how to fill that void in yourself. Just stop rushing. There is no hurry. Healing takes time, and we are emotional people; we get attached, and it takes time to process our feelings.

Getting over someone doesn’t happen overnight. But, Practicing the above ways can definitely guide you in your journey of healing. We understand your feelings, whether you’re still hurting from the end of a traumatic long-distance relationship, trying to forget someone, or just trying to move on from an unfulfilled crush: It’s hard to go past a loved one.

How to get over someone
source: Unsplash

In fact, see this change as an opportunity for reconnecting with yourself. Often, The idea of love makes us put the other person ahead of us. Now you can again restart your life the way you want and channel your emotions positively.

Being emotional and loving is a blessing; don’t let it become a weakness. Whatever your circumstances are, do remember it’s just a phase, it will get over, and you will come back stronger than ever.

Lastly, I hope you got the answer to how to get over someone and move ahead in you life.

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