Attachment is a human tendency, and it comes naturally to us. From the time we are born, we develop a sense of attachment; studies have shown that an infant is attached to the parent. Thus, this attachment is important for shaping a person’s personality.
We, humans, are a complicated species; we crave being loved and being with someone. So when we are attached to someone, we feel secure, safe, and loved. This is something we all desire, but when this beautiful feeling of attachment comes too often, this can become a toxic trait and can lead to emotional damage; that’s when we need help.
This is when we ask ourselves why do I get attached so easily. If you feel like they are the one after just one or two dates, then this article is for you. Ahead in this article, we will talk about the signs that you need to see if you get attached easily and the solutions as well. So let us dive in.
Psychology Behind Attachment
To begin with, you need to understand what attachment type is. This will help you know yourself better and how you behave when you are attached. Whatever your attachment type is, it is not a conscious choice.
Regardless of your current attachment style, it can be secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, or disorganized avoidant. Your attachment type was created at an early phase in life.
Your attachment style is determined by the level of attunement, loving connection, security, and safety you experienced with your parents or caregivers as a child; it is not a “conscious decision.”
Your attachment style in adulthood will be most apparent in intimate relationships since it was created based on your experience with personal caregiving connections.
Intimate relationships, where vulnerability, trust, and safety are most important, expose your attachment wounds. Because of this, a person you are attached to can strongly trigger your traumas.
You don’t want to get hurt, and that’s why you don’t want to get attached easily to other people. Because that way, you give them the power to trigger you and hurt you. Here are some reasons you need to see for yourself if you get attached easily to others.
Attachment Theory: Explained
The theory of attachment explains why we act the way we do when dating and in relationships, and it can be especially reassuring for those who experience anxious attachments, which are characterized by a tendency to become overly emotionally attached to new people/partners quickly and a lack of security.
Moreover, stress can frequently bring out a person’s “worst” attachment issues; thus, they are more likely to occur when harmful patterns linked to trauma and wounds are more constantly triggering you.
On the other hand, because attachment issues are worsened by “opposing” traits, some attachment types have a tendency to be toxic to one another.
For instance, a partner who has an avoidant attachment style and a tendency to push others away will probably be very triggering to someone who has an anxious desire to attach and connect.
Even though healing is possible in any bonding and connection, some combinations make healing attachment issues far more difficult.
So if you are finding it hard to heal your attachment issues, you are more likely to find yourself constantly contemplating sending them a text or wishing they would acknowledge your feelings. Even though this might be quite draining and exhausting, feeling this way is completely natural and common.
Only when it becomes harmful and starts to take over your life should you start to be concerned about it. Here are some reasons why you get attached too easily to others and how you can prevent it.
You have an Anxious Attachment Style
If you quite often ask yourself, “Why do I get attached so easily,” then you might have an anxious attachment style. You have this constant need for a partnership to make you feel secure and accepted. But you don’t realize that this need is making you insecure and emotionally weak.
This type of attachment style makes you feel that the person you are attached to might not be there with you tomorrow, which unknowingly enhances and intensify your attachment.
This happens because of your insecurity, so whenever you meet someone who you feel comfortable with. You develop a sense of attachment because they make you feel accepted, but at this stage, your emotions are controlling you. You have a deep fear that they might leave you, and you won’t ever find someone like them again.
This type of attachment affects not only you but also your Partner. Can feel exhausted by constantly assuring that they will not leave your side.
You make your decision based on your feelings and emotions
This is why people say “love is blind” because when you are in a relationship, everything feels nice, and your emotions take over your mind. Your emotions start controlling your decision-making. This means even after seeing the red flags, and you will still develop feelings and get attached to someone.
This will make you seek validation from that person you will find yourself overthinking about them all the time. And if they don’t respond the same way, you can get hurt. So take control of your emotions and think practically. Don’t let anyone take control of your decisions.
It’s great to listen to your Partner and understand their opinion. But in a healthy relationship, don’t lose yourself and have your own identity as well.
You are too Dependent on your Partner
When you are in a relationship, you feel great, and you have this idea in your mind that you cant be happy otherwise. You make your relationship the center of your universe and then develop a fear that you can’t ever be happy without this relationship.