Often times we feel that we are less than others. There is no denial of the fact that this feeling is not good, and this somehow makes our self-esteem very low. It also makes us feel worse about ourselves.
The feeling of not being good enough is sulking and takes away a lot of things from us. And this is why it is important that we maintain positive thinking about ourselves. And it will help you know that you are good enough.
Do you know that when you feel negative about yourself, you are automatically entering into a cycle of a negative zone? You will constantly be thinking bad about yourself henceforth, And this is why it is important for you to think positively about yourself.
I know this can be hard because the feeling or the status of being not good enough is actually dependent on a lot of factors and incidents which happened to us in the past. However, there are a few things that you can do to affirm your value in your eyes.
Before we start, I would like you to stay calm and take deep breaths for 20-30 seconds. The reason why are you here right now, reading this article is that somewhere you feel you are not worthy enough. Relax and let go of it so you can read and implement the points I have mentioned.
Confirm Your Worthiness by Following these Things
1. Let Go of the Past
Think About It. What are the things or incidents which happened in the past that make you feel you are not good enough? Now, this can be multiple things. Were you bullied, were you a weak student in school or college, did you fail at something or the other in the past or any other incident which you remember?
Try to remember those incidents which made you feel less. And do this honestly; there is no one to judge you. It is important for you to know what made you feel less of yourself. After you figure it out, just let it go. What has gone is gone. Focus on your upcoming life now.
Do not allow things of the past to haunt you. I know that it’s easier said than done, but you need to stop thinking of these incidents and start believing in yourself. This is important for you to grow.
2. Think About Any Childhood Trauma
Sometimes our approach and attitude toward life date back to our childhood. These incidents are actually engraved in our minds deeply. These are very simple things or incidents, but the impact is huge. For example, being compared to our siblings, being told by our parents or teachers that we are not good enough, and constantly scolded by parents for being messy or irresponsible.
These incidents are not easy to forget. This is because these incidents force you to think that you are worthless. They leave an impact on your mind, and the messages you give to yourself about yourself are negative.
But you need to know that you are good enough and believe that. If you believe that you cannot come out of these traumas on your own, take help from your friends or someone very close to you. You can also take help from a therapist if you wish to.
One of the things which can help in this case is to talk to your parents about it. Bad parenting is a thing but sometimes parents do not think of the bad impact their words have on their children. Tell them that their words made you feel miserable.
They might then help you to come over it, and realize their mistakes. If there are any other incidents of your childhood that haunt you, discuss them. If you feel that no one among your friends or family would understand, take help from a well-certified therapist. Don’t just go to any therapist, go for the best one in your town after proper research.
3. Stop Comparing Yourself To Others
Do not keep constantly thinking that this person is better than you. Sometimes we think – I wish I could be like him/her. I wish I could do things like him/her. I wish I was better than others. These comparisons will bring nothing but depression to you.
Whatever you are, however you are, you are Enough. Just keep focusing on improving yourself. Make yourself your own competitor. Your competition should be with yourself – to make yourself better than what you were yesterday.
Everyone has their own journey, you have your own. So it makes no sense to compare your journey what others. You need to trust yourself and your journey. Things will eventually happen and fall into place.
Do not allow anyone to convince you that your journey does not matter. It does and you need no approval of others for it. Whatever your journey is until now, accept it. Know that you are capable of achieving greatness to attract good things in life.
4. Start Thinking Positive About Yourself
You can do an exercise for yourself which I practice every day. This practice helped me to notice the small minute details about myself and made me realize my good qualities and strengths.
See what are the things you did today that made you feel good, and write about them. For example, it can be – I cooked delicious pasta today, I watered the plants today, I helped a stranger to find his route, I performed well at school or job today, and others.
Try to note even the smallest things which made you feel good. Often times we neglect these small things. But these things can actually help you feel better about yourself. I can promise you that if you do this exercise right now, you will automatically start feeling better.
Now imagine doing this every day. Imagine what positive impact this small little exercise every day can bring to you. This is a simple exercise that will not take much time. So even if you have a busy schedule, you can follow this. I am very sure this exercise will help you as it has helped me.
5. Start Practicing Gratitude
Sometimes we are so engrossed in things we do not have that we actually stop thinking about the things which we should be grateful for. These things do not just need to be materialistic things. These are all the small things that make you feel that you have a lot of things in life.
For example – I am grateful for the food I ate today, and I am grateful for my parents. I am grateful for the food I ate today, and I am grateful for being alive, and others.
It is scientifically proven that Gratitude helps to develop a positive state of mind and makes us feel better. When you feel better, it is very unlikely to allow negative self-talk or negative things to affect you.
Practicing Gratitude can be life-changing for you. Even the successful people in the world practice Gratitude every day.
6. Talk About Your Strengths
Do you know one of the most important reasons why you think so low about yourself and feel that you are not good enough? This is because you only talk about your weaknesses. It is very likely that they will make you feel bad.
But what if you start talking about your strengths? It is proven that a positive thought is 100 times stronger than a negative thought. Imagine the positive consequences you will have when you start thinking good about yourself when you start talking about your strengths.
Your strengths can be simple – I communicate easily with people. I forgive people easily, I am a good writer, and people like to read my poems, I dress nicely, and people appreciate my dress sense, I manage my time properly, etc. Notice your strengths about yourself, and start talking about them to yourself.
7. Stop Looking For Perfection in Yourself and Accept your Flaws
You know it is said that Perfection is a myth, isn’t it? And this is absolutely true. Nobody, and absolutely nobody, is perfect. The richest and the most successful people in the world, too, are not perfect. They constantly try to upgrade themselves, but they know that they will never be able to become perfect.
It is okay to have flaws. Just Accept it. You are a human being, and it is very normal to have some flaws. If you do not accept your flaws, how can you expect others to accept yourself with your flaws? Remember, you are perfect with your imperfection.
Your flaws make you unique and powerful. Do not run away from it or start chasing perfection. Perfection doesn’t exist. If there are things on which you can work, it is okay. If not, just let it go. Embrace your flaws. Acknowledge that you are sufficient even after you have flaws in you.
8. Talk to yourself as you will with your child
If you are someone who has this constant habit of negative self-talk, think about this for a while. Will you be able to talk like this to your child? You woud like to give your child a positive environment. So it is important for you to talk to them positively and instill self-confidence in them. You need to do the same things to yourself too.
Treat yourself like your own child when it comes to positive talk and confidence. It will change the way you talk and think about yourself You will ultimately get to know your actual worth and realize it too.
So this was all about the 8 ways to know your actual worth. I hope you implement the points I mentioned above on this subject
I would like to end this article with one message – Do not make anyone feel you are less of yourself. Don’t fight with yourself, instead accept the way you are. Believe me, others will start doing the same.
As George Bernard Shaw said – “The most important aspect of change is that it starts within”. Trust yourself and take action with full confidence to better your life.
You can also check – why should you never force anyone to talk to you?
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